Photo: Unsplash/Pixabay

This is why you suck at Instagramming

Bradley Wint
By - Founder/Executive Editor
Aug 1, 2016 12:54am AST
Photo: Unsplash/Pixabay

Almost everyone and their pet rock have an Instagram account since Facebook bought them out in 2012, but there are those few pesky posters who don’t seem to get it right.

With the ability to upload previously saved photos, the environment has changed so drastically where photos no longer contain their candid qualities. Even though there aren’t really any rules when it comes to what you can post, there are a few photos that simply shouldn’t make the cut.

Staged/Faked photos

There’s no shame in trying to present a picture perfect moment. No one in their right mind would post a photo of themselves fighting with their lover. However, setting up a staged photo really doesn’t make things any better, or should I say, legitimate.

If you’re running on the treadmill for 5 minutes to tell people that you’re ‘exercising’ or pouring two glasses of wine to make it appear as if you’re on a date, then you’re doing it wrong.

Now you may be thinking to yourself that only crazy people would do such things, but in reality a lot of us do this from time to time (sometimes without even realizing it), even if it’s just one or two of the hundreds of photos we post.

There’s a great short film about this which we posted about some time back.

Taking only selfies when on vacation

So you’ve managed to fly all the way to Europe, or somewhere exotic like the Caribbean, Thailand, The Maldives, or even Chernobyl…aaaaand you take only selfies.

I mean it’s totally fine to take a selfie or two when on vacation, but then there’s that problem where all your vacay photos are selfies with a tiny portion of the scenery in the background. I personally love traveling and live vicariously through my friends’ photos, but in order to do so, I’d need to see the actual environment.

How can I enjoy the white sand, blue water beaches of Antigua or lush green mountains of Bhutan if your face is in the way? I already know what you look like, now show me something else.

Posting too many photos

I’ll give a bit of wiggle room for this as there are some comedy accounts I don’t mind over posting, but when I see regular individuals posting 3-5 photos daily, I see it as them as being starved for attention.

There really isn’t much that can be said about this as it’s pretty self explanatory. I could make an exception for those who are single and want something to do with their lives, but those who are in relationships and take a photo of every single moment with a caption like “having dinner”, “just bored in bed”, “1 month anniversary”, “27th day anniversary” should just stop right now.

The last time I checked, relationships were between those in the relationship only, and not the rest of the world.

My personal mantra has always been been quality over quantity, and this applies perfectly to maintaining an Instagram account.

Using crappy filters when the original photo looks much better

Unless you’re using an app like Prisma, there’s a good chance those default Instagram filters actually make your photos look worse than they really are.

ig-filters

Here’s a regular cup of coffee along with it being passed through some of Instagram’s filters. In my opinion, most of these look like crap. Instead you could have used the editing tool to touch up the contrast while killing off some of the haze.

ig-filters2

Here’s another filter (from a 3rd party app) which just looks awful. There are some of us who relish living in the past, but not everyone is good at picking a decent filter.

Quotes, quotes, quotes

bullshit-quote

We’ve all shared a quote from time to time, but there are those whose few who over share their newly discovered words of wisdom. I’ve decided to break down this category into subpoints for easier classification.

  • All about the money, but still broke – These quotes are those typical motivational statements from industry leaders with a generic background photo of a guy in a suit leaning on a Ferrari or someone looking at their Rolex watch and Lamborghini steering wheel. Posting these types of quotes is fine, but make sure to live up to the hype. If you’re constantly posting about success but your checking account always says -$27.00, then your priorities are in the wrong place.
  • Passive aggressive attacks – More than a few people tend to avoid confrontation with their friends or relatives, and take the passive route by posting passive aggressive posts on their Instagram accounts. You may have been randomly scrolling through your timeline to see a photo quote such as “People get mad when you treat them how they treat you” or “The saddest thing about betrayal is that it never comes from your enemies”, or even “Be happy. It drives people crazy”. Save us the drama and go talk to your friend about why they changed your Netfix password instead of berating them on social media.
  • Can’t get over your ex 3 years later – Dumping/being dumped can be quite an emotional time in our lives for many of us, but most of us tend to bounce back after a while, whether be be a few months or even as long as a year (or more). Then there are those who live in a perpetual state of depression and vent by posting quotes about making changes or being unable to cope. There comes a time in our lives where we just have to draw a line and forget about what happened and move on. Posting quotes like these only drags out the recovery process, so save yourself and the rest of us the sad story and make that positive change in your life.

Hopefully this little ‘guide’ can help you stay on the pathway of Instagram success, or at least keep you out of the path of being unfollowed.

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